127th & FREDERICK DOUGLAS BLVD – Gourmet & Deli Bodega has tapped Rocky, a gray tabby, as their Chief Financial Officer on Tuesday. Rocky, who joined the firm in 2012, will now oversee almost $45,000 of annual revenue throughout the corner shop.
Rocky was previously a mouser in the alley out back, where he was discovered in a cardboard box by Gourmet & Deli CEO Carlos Medeiros. “Rocky is a fantastic addition to the executive team,” says Mr. Medeiros, “and I have full faith and confidence in his ability to maintain the financial diligence required to thrive in this economy.”
Although Rocky has worked his way up to the C-suite from keeping the Takis & Wise chip aisle free from vermin, his promotion is not without controversy. Hector Diaz, another frontrunner for CFO, says Mr. Medeiros’ decision doesn’t sit well with him, “Rocky’s a fuckin’ cat, man. Dude doesn’t even have thumbs. This is total BS.”
Rocky succeeds Lola, an 8 year old Calico, who was hit by a Snapple truck earlier this week.