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Posts published in May 2020

Do Video Games that Glorify Loot Boxes Cause More Looting?

MINNEAPOLIS, MN — With many Americans aghast at the destruction following some of the peaceful protests against police brutality, critics of the video game industry say that heavy promotion of loot boxes in games has caused young people to repeat the behavior in real life. Publishers like Electronic Arts have defended the mechanic in the immensely popular Star Wars Battlefront II, claiming that any connection between the randomly-generated digital grab bags and razing big box retail stores in righteous anger is purely coincidental.… Read more

SpaceX Scrubs Launch After Astronauts Demand Spacesuits

CAPE CANAVERAL, FL — The launch of two NASA astronauts on a rocket built by SpaceX would have also launched the age of private space exploration were it not for a dispute with the billionaire Elon Musk over proper protective equipment for the flight into space. The astronauts, Robert L. Behnken and Douglas G. Hurley, veterans of NASA and accustomed to donning full space suits when leaving the Earth’s atmosphere, had asked Mr.… Read more

Unearthed Ruins of Ancient Sbarro Changes Timeline of Pizzafication of Europe

MARSEILLE, France — New discoveries in the Provence may have anthropologists rethinking the history of the region as well as humans’ relationship with the culinary arts. Archeologists last month confirmed artifacts from a dig site south of Saint-Rémy belong to the earliest known Sbarro fast-casual restaurant and date to the beginning of the fourth century B.C.,… Read more

What Every Post-Coronavirus Office Needs

What does the ‘New Normal’ modern American office look like when, or if, workers return? Gone will be the communal perks of beer kegs and ice cream socials, as well as amenities often taken for granted, like shared office supplies and conference rooms. Our business lifestyle reporter Janet sat down with Melinda May, futurist and CEO of Syt, a direct-to-business office furniture startup, selling premium equipment to other growing companies.… Read more

Alison Roman Also Responsible for Malagasy Murders Fueled by Vanilla Trade

ANTANANARIVO, Madagascar — Alison Roman, the millennial cookbook author who rose to internet stardom on her approachable charm, is still reeling from a candid interview in which she dismissed other internet stars with less-approachable charm. Like all viral backlash, many feel the issues run deeper than the slight and have raised their voices on Roman’s appropriation of ethnic flavors as well as a series of violent assaults in the Anjahana jungles of Madagascar in an effort to secure those very spices.… Read more

Whole Foods Employees Quit for Safety of Times Square Elmos

NEW YORK CITY — As Whole Foods stores remain open amid the pandemic and workers are increasingly anxious about their safety, a leaked company report states that nearly two dozen local employees have resigned their posts at the Amazon-held chain to pursue a career with less public interaction, suiting up as unlicensed characters in Times Square.… Read more

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